Of Cigars, Suits, and a nice Cup of Tea
by Mr. Urahara
Summary: What happened after the vampire Alucard was awakened? We all know the scenario ten years later, but how did Integra go from a young girl to a strong woman? This is that story. Maybe. Agh, my summary skillz are horrid. Readplz. :3 Chapter three is UP!
1. Screaming Hurts Vampiric Ears

_Zis is the creator of zis fanfiction, Urahara the Integra Fanboy. I dunno why, but what happened between Alucard's awakening and the Cheddar Village attack has always made me think. Why does Alucard enjoy his servitude? Why didn't Integra seal him away? Sure, this isn't canon or anything, but still, why not try it? There'll be fourth-wall breaking moments and inserts of my odd humor here and there, and maybe even a few cameos by random characters from other fictional works I've read.So here's chapter one of my new (and hopefully finishable) fanfiction, _Of Cigars, Suits, and a nice Cup of Tea.

**_NOTE:_ I do NOT own any of the characters here. I only own the plot, and even then, it's not copyrighted. Y'dig? --brick'd--**

* * *

_**Screaming Hurts Vampiric Ears**_

"..Alucard."

The kneeling vampire in leather bowed his head further to the human girl sitting in front of him, his face obscured by a mess of white hair. She had been surprised as soon as he had gone down, and was even more confused when the vampire called her 'master'.

First things first.

One: there was a vampire in front of her that had just murdered a bunch of people. Respond by moving away from it.

And that she did, using the wall to help herself up, all the while clutching the pistol her uncle tried to kill her with and that she ultimately killed him with instead.

Two: a vampire just ripped people apart. Respond: throw up.

And she did that, too, going down on her knees.

Three: just threw up after seeing a corpse turn into a vampire and rip people apart. Respond: pass out.

Well, she was about to do that, but instead decided that moving further away from the homocidal beast would be a good idea to do before collapsing in front of it.

Her pet just watched as she stumbled about, and got up to make sure she didn't fall and crack her skull open. That wouldn't be a very good thing, as the girl's blood would probably mix with the rest of the blood. The thought disgusted him.

So, as she finally got up the door, he followed after her, which made her try to move away faster.

But she was outside of his cell, so you'd _think_ it would be fine in his mind if she fell and died. However, he had his own reasons for his next actions.

As the girl stumbled down, blacking out, the vampire took action and used his inhuman speed to catch her.

"Humans are so pathetic," he muttered, carrying the limp figure up and out of the dungeon.

He had no idea where she could be placed, so when he was above ground he opened every door he saw, and if it looked like it would belong to a human girl, then he wouldn't close it. Only a few rooms out of the whole upper level looked that way, so he took the one that smelled the most like her.

Placing the girl down, her vampire frowned. There was nothing for him to do but wait..

..And change his clothes.

In a cloud of dark matter, the leather he was wearing transformed into a black suit, with a victorian-style knotted tie. Black boots went up almost to his knee, with a slight brownish tint to them. Over his suit formed a red coat of the same victorian style.

His hair changed from long and white to short and black, and snuggling fit on his head was a wide, floppy-brimmed hat of the same coloration as his coat, and to cover his red eyes formed orange-lensed glowing sunglasses that were, in a way, like goggles.

So the vampire Alucard sat down in a chair near his master Integra's bed, waiting for her to awake. Knowing how fragile humans can be, that would either take very little time or far too much.

* * *

Integra awoke with a yelp, horrified at the dream she had. A vampire sealed in the dungeon had come loose, and her uncle tried to kill her, but the vampire killed everyone but her, and.. 

It made her sick thinking about it. Such an amazingly detailed dream. It almost felt real.

As she tried to lift herself out of her bed, Integra felt a sharp pain through her right upper arm.

Where she had gotten hurt in the dream.

_No. It must just be a coincidence._ She tried to convince herself that she might've just forgotten about accidentally hurting herself or something, but that was impossible. Nothing _that_ important would have just slipped her mind.

"I see you're finally awake."

The voice.

It was the same voice as the vampire from her dream.

Could it really be possible that what she had dreamt was actually a memory?

She looked in the direction of the voice, and saw a red-clad figure standing beside her bed.

The great Sir Integra screamed. Loudly.

* * *

Alucard narrowed his eyes from behind his sunglasses. She had _seemed_ to be a promising leader, but here she was, screaming in fear at the vampire _she_ woke up. 

_I was better off in the dungeon.._ "I thought when you shot your uncle I'd have a strong master to control me. Now you're just a pathetic little girl. Please, just seal me away again."

"Y-you vampire! What are you doing here?! What are you talking about?!"

"Ugh. You humans are so incompetant. If you have no use for me, then seal me away in my cell again so I don't have to listen to your _whining!_"

Alucard had walked back to his seat and plopped down, deciding that staying too close to his 'master' would probably end up with him destroying something. However, she had taken offense to his words, which made him a little happier.

But just a little. Integra wasn't showing the courage she had earlier.

"I'll have you know that I'm the head of the Hellsing family, an organization of vampire hunters! I'll summon someone up here to kill you!"

"I know who you are, MISS Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing. You're weakness is making me hate this servitude even more, MASTER."

And that's when Integra had the urge to attack her new pet. Luckily enough for both of them, she controlled herself. So, she angrily left her own room to hide away in the library. That rude vampire would _never_ think to look in there.

* * *

"Boo." 

Alucard's hat-less head came through the bookshelf that Integra was looking at, severely startling her. Apparently there was no place she could hide from him that he would know to look.

"Just wait until Walter gets back, vampire! He'll get rid of you!"

"Oh, so the Angel of Death is still alive, hm? I thought he would've died by now." Alucard chuckled, imagining his friend old and frail. He came completely through the bookcase, and held Integra's shoulders.

"Listen, MASTER. I am the vampire bound to your family. Now that you have woken me up, I must serve you. The only way to get rid of me is to kill me and finally give me the peace your Great-Grandfather wouldn't allow me or seal me away like your father did. But seeing as you have no one to protect a little girl such as yourself other than Walter, it would be wise for you to keep me from a peaceful rest. I would TRULY appreciate it, however, if you would act like a stronger master than you are now, or I'll constantly beg for you to seal me away. Is that understood, MASTER?!" It had taken all he had not to apply enough force to break any of Integra's bones, and he immediately drew back.

"..I'm retreating to my coffin. Hopefully no one touched it over the years.."

With that, the vampire faded away, leaving Integra all alone.

At least Walter would be back by the evening.

_**CHAPTER ONE://END**_

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_If this was liked by you Hellsing fans, then would you mind rating it? Yes, it's short compared to what I was expecting, but I'll try to make up for it next chapter. Especially since Walter appears. Mmkay?_


	2. Kill Me Now or Lock Me Up

_Hooray for reviews. Thank you for letting me know that this is being read. 3_

_Agh, never tried Walter before. So he may seem a bit OoC. At least I have an excuse, though. xD Anyvayz, time for Integra to get some answers. Hoo-rah._

**NOTE: I do not own Hellsing. At all. If I did, wouldn't I have somehow forced this into canon?**

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_**Kill Me Now or Lock Me Up**_

The monocled old butler's jaw dropped. He had certainly not been expecting a surprise like _this_ when he entered the Hellsing mansion again. Actually, his idea of arrival was more "I come back, Richard says Hi, go help Integra with starting her new job as the leader of the Hellsing organization, and then taking a nap."

"You certainly haven't aged well, Walter."

His jaw gaping, he stuttered as he spoke. "A-Alucard! What are you doing here?! Aren't you supposed to be sealed away in the dungeon?! Where are Miss Integra and Richard?"

Integra's pet shrugged. "The girl woke me up unintentionally when she was shot by Richard. I killed him and his men, thinking that she'd be a worthwhile master from the way she reacted towards me, but now I'm starting to think I should've let her die. Nowhere near as brave as before. Even threatened to send soldiers on me..."

Walter was still staring. Alucard chuckled at the thought of mere _soldiers_ trying to kill him.

"Y-you killed Richard?!"

"He tried to kill her and claim the title as head of the family when the girl truly was. And he shot me."

Walter sighed, regained his composure, and then started picking up his luggage.

"I'm going to find Integra and try to see if I can help her realize that you're as much her servant to this family as I am, and you are fully under her control."

"You do that." Alucard phased through a wall and out to who-knows-where to do who-knows-what.

* * *

Walter found Integra sitting behind her father's--now her own--old desk in his--now her--office. 

She was seated with her knees pulled up to her chest, and didn't seem to notice Walter when he entered.

"Miss Integra, is everything alright?"

"..Walter, you're back." It looked as if she had been crying--it made sense, considering all that had happened to her in just a few days. She lost her only living relatives and instead had a vampire and an old butler to live with her, and they were just servants.

"Integra, tell me what's wrong."

"I can't do this, Walter. I can't. I'm too young, and so much has happened. I need father back. And I need to get rid of that bloody vampire, too. Why is he even here, Walter?"

"Well, I wanted to inform you of the details surrounding Alucard's servitude. You see--"

"Oh, so she _does_ want to get rid of me. How marvelous. Do what she says, Walter. Seal me back up. I don't need to be here. Besides, once she's gone I'll be free again."

Walter hadn't thought of that, and the surprised look on his face made Integra's eyes widen. They both turned towards the left wall, where Alucard was propped up against.

"What does he mean by 'free again', Walter? Does that mean that if I die then we'll have this /thing/ running around loose, killing people?"

"Miss Integra, let me explain. Alucard is--"

"I'm bound to your family, and when there's no one left, the servitude ends. No more seals on me. In fact, I could probably revert back to my old name if I decided that 'Alucard' didn't strike enough fear into the hearts of you pathetic humans."

"'Old Name'? What's he talking about? Tell me, Walter!"

"Integra, he--"

"Hah! I'm amazed that you didn't take this time to search through the information in the dungeon. If you were worthy of leading this organization, you would've."

By that time Walter was about to snap. Alucard was acting like a child, Integra was completely confused, and _no one would just stop._

**"I CAN'T TAKE THIS! ALUCARD, STOP INTERRUPTING! YOU'RE MAKING THINGS WORSE! INTEGRA, I'M SORRY, BUT IF YOU JUST LET ME EXPLAIN THEN THERE WOULDN'T BE ANY QUESTIONS! AM I CLEAR, YOU TWO?!"**

The yelling had strained his voice--as he _never_ needs to yell, never loses his temper, and definitely doesn't get angry. Except when Alucard starts up like this. Back when he was younger, Alucard at least had /some/ self control, but now it was as if he was _trying_ to give Walter a stress-induced heart attack.

Alucard just stared at the red-faced butler. He had never seen Walter flip out like that before, and it certainly wasn't a fun thing. Definitely not when you considered the fact that Walter was the only person he knew who could possibly kill him--permanently. And with dental floss, nonetheless.

"Fine. Go ahead. I won't interrupt."

With those words the No-Life King turned his head towards the ground, his glowing sunglasses blocking his eyes. Taking the place of his previous "I'm-better-than-you" smile was a frown, showing his young master that even a psychotic, soulless creature could feel _some_ sort of emotion. Even if it was shown like that of a small child.

"Alright. Miss Integra, Alucard is a vampire that has been under the control of the Hellsing Organization for nearing a century now. As you know, Hellsing was founded by your great-grandfather, Abraham van Helsing. Seals have been placed on him to keep him from killing as he wants, and he will only listen to a member of the Hellsing family."

He paused, making sure that Integra was calm enough to take it in, and when she nodded for him to continue, he did.

"We have estimated that Alucard is over 550 years old, and from Abraham van Helsing's encounter and capture of him, his original name was Vlad Ţepeş--though he's better known as Count Dracula."

Integra looked over at Alucard. _That_ was _Dracula_? Why hadn't her father told her about this when he was teaching her? Why was Alucard never mentioned? And why wasn't his name the same?

She decided to voice out that last question.

"Alucard, why was your name changed?"

He shrugged. "I didn't have a choice in it. My last master called me that. You can call me whatever you want, too."

"No, I'll keep it Alucard."

"Fine."

As soon as they finished, Walter continued.

"Alucard is restricted by a control art system that he can only access to level two. Any levels beyond that--one and zero--require your permission to activate. He also must follow any command you have, and--"

"So if I tell him to leave he'll have to listen?"

"Yes. He is bound to you until you die. That's where if there's not another in the Hellsing line, he'll go free."

"Go free? You mean he'll be allowed to do whatever he wants?"

"Exactly. There would be no restraints to keep him from completely wiping out the human race, and he'd have control over all vampires--as he is the No-Life King, a vampire that is closer to immortality than any other being on Earth."

Integra started moving into a more normal position in her chair--going from knees-up to I'm-about-to-get-up.

"I'm going to bed. I haven't had any sleep since I woke up to see _him_--" she nodded her head towards Alucard "--watching me."

"Alright, Miss Integra. I'll prepare your bed for you."

After Walter had left, she sighed and got up. It was going to be a long lifetime.

As she reached the door, she looked over at where Alucard had been listening from.

There was no trace of her new pet vampire.

_**CHAPTER TWO://END**  
_

* * *

_Ah, anozervahn bites the dust. Hopefully I'll get used to Walter during the next few chapters to minimize the OoC-ness of him. Too bad we never got more Young!Integra. That would've been awesome and would've made this easier. I've started planning out chapter three, so expect some personality changes in Integra. Can't have her acting like a weak little child for too much longer, right?  
_


	3. Never Trust a Well Dressed Vampire

_Took a while, but here's chapter three. Hopefully I'll get through this creative rut…_

**NOTE: I do not own Hellsing. My name is not Kouhta Hirano. And besides, I wouldn't want to own my dear Sir Integra. **_**  
**_

* * *

_**Never Trust a Well-Dressed Vampire**_

The pet was planning.

Deep under the mansion, in his room which contained only his coffin and a few empty blood packets that he had found while looking around the Hellsing manor, the No-Life King was planning.

In fact, he had been planning ever since his master awoke.

Alucard sat on the lid of his coffin, elbows propped up on his knees, leaning forward, with his fingers intertwined in front of him.

The same pose that his master would often use in the years to come.

His plan was simple--shape his master the way that he wants her to become, and make her trust him enough to get what he wants from her--at least sometimes.

_First thing I'll have to ask for is a chair. A throne, perhaps. Yes, that would fit nice--_

Alucard's thoughts were interrupted when Integra suddenly showed up, a mischievous smile on her face, and the first thing that he thought was _Step one--let Integra know who she's dealing with is now complete._

The first thing Integra thought was _Why does he look so relaxed?_ This would be expected, as Alucard's hat, glasses, coat, and suit-coat were missing. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up, and it definitely made him lose that "I'm awesomer than you" look. Instead, it was more...casual.

"What is it, Integra?"

"I have orders for you. One, I don't want you calling me 'Integra'. I can't stand the thought of a vampire saying my name. You will refer to me as 'master' and only that until I specifically tell you that you are allowed to say 'Integra'. Secondly, I don't want you to act like a child, like you did yesterday in my father's--I mean, MY office. Thirdly, any time that I wish to get information from you, I don't want any smart remarks, just answer my question. Alright, vampire?"

He smirked. The girl that had shown no fear towards him had returned again. Hopefully she'd stay this time.

"Of course, my master."

"Good. Now come on. I'm going to put you to work somehow."

The count merely smiled. Perfect.

* * *

Alucard's regular attire had returned to its usual place, and as Integra strode through the halls, the vampire glided behind her as if he wasn't even touching the floor. She had no real destination--she just wanted to find something that she could make Alucard do so he wouldn't be useless. 

And it was then that Walter appeared, with a worried look on his face.

"Ah, Miss Integra. We just got a call. There's a vampire attack, and we must deal with it right away. Shall I send the troops?"

Integra thought for a moment. Maybe she had finally found something for her pet to do.

"Walter, how many vampires are there?"

"Three, but according to the report, there are maybe 20 seen Ghouls."

"Alucard, would you be able to handle that?"

"Easily."

"Good. Would it be alright if I went with him, Walter? He should be able to keep me safe, if he's as strong as he likes to say he is."

This surprised the butler. The first vampire attack since she became the head of Hellsing a few days ago and she wants to go?

"I-I'm not sure if you should, Integra, because--"

"It's like I said, Walter, Alucard can protect me. It'd be great if you could come along as well. I want to see a real vampire. This one just isn't normal."

"Don't worry, Walter, she'll be fine with me. I can't harm her, you know," there was a tinge of anger in his voice, mainly because of Integra saying that her pet wasn't normal and that she needed to see a _real_ vampire. Integra assumed it was because he couldn't harm her, but Walter knew that she had hurt his pride a little.

"All right. I'll handle the paperwork. Alucard, don't let anything happen to her."

"Think about it, Walter. I've handle far worse situations."

The vampire spoke the truth. Back in '44, the pair had handled a greater enemy than just a few vampires. Alucard could handle himself.

* * *

The pet led his master to her room, saying that he would prefer that she change into something more fitting for a vampire hunter. Integra had no idea what he had meant--what did a vampire hunter _wear_, anyways? 

The problem was solved when she saw a suit--just her size--laid out on her bed. Complete with a blue tie similar to the pet's.

"Alucard, what's this?"

"Walter and I decided that it wouldn't be very official for you to go around dressed like a schoolgirl. A suit fits a knight far better, and you won't seem even slightly weak dressed like this."

He had a point. A knight running around in a schoolgirl's outfit giving orders wasn't a very threatening idea, and now she had to turn all of her attention to the organization. There was no room for unprofessionalism, she decided, and ordered her vampire out so that the young Hellsing would have some privacy.

"Of course, master," was all he had said, leaving without much resistance.

Besides, he needed to add onto his plan. Alucard had known a vampire attack would happen eventually, and that she'd want to go, but it had only been a few days since he had woken up.

It was time for the No-Life King's presence to become known once again.

_**Chapter Three://END**  
_

* * *

_It's shorter than usual, yes, but I've had writer's block ever since I started the chapter. It makes me sad. BAAHT now that we're getting into more action-filled parts, mehbeh everything will get easier to write? We'll see.  
_


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